How Executive learn (the secret they are keeping from you), Building Unshakeable Confidence: 3 Simple Shifts, and choose your pain

Hey there,

Hope this newsletter finds you well! I've been reflecting lately on how much our inner dialogue shapes our reality. Just last week, I caught myself in that familiar spiral of self-doubt before a presentation—then remembered to apply the exact strategies I'm sharing with you today. The difference was immediate.

Let's dive in!

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#1. The 3 simple shifts that transformed my rock-bottom confidence

Have you ever avoided mirrors, dodged eye contact, or heard that persistent inner voice whispering "not good enough"? That was me—until I discovered what truly builds lasting confidence.

The transformation wasn't overnight, but these three shifts made all the difference:

1. I stopped seeking external validation

This was the hardest but most powerful change. Instead of chasing approval from others, I:

• Created internal approval systems (tracking personal growth metrics)

• Celebrated small wins daily (even tiny progress deserves acknowledgment)

• Eliminated comparison completely (others' journeys became inspiration, not competition)

2. I embraced uncomfortable situations

Growth happens at the edge of comfort, so I deliberately:

• Said yes to speaking opportunities (even when terrified)

• Initiated conversations with strangers (starting with simple compliments)

• Asked questions when confused (realizing this shows strength, not weakness)

3. I practiced self-compassion daily

The way we talk to ourselves matters more than we realize:

• Replaced criticism with curiosity ("What can I learn?" instead of "I failed")

• Talked to myself like a trusted friend (would you speak to someone you love the way you speak to yourself?)

• Acknowledged progress, not perfection (celebrating the journey, not just destinations)

Implementation tip: Choose just ONE of these strategies to focus on this week. Small, consistent changes create lasting confidence far better than attempting everything at once.

#2. THE 70-20-10 RULE:  How Experience teaches you 7x more than formal education

Ever wonder why some highly educated people struggle in leadership roles while others with less formal training seem to effortlessly navigate complex business challenges?

The answer: Top executives have been quietly leveraging a learning secret for decades.

🧠 The Learning Breakdown That Changes Everything

The 70-20-10 rule explains this perfectly:

• 70% - Direct Experience & Challenging Assignments

  • Wrestling with real problems

  • Making mistakes and iterating solutions

  • Taking on projects beyond your comfort zone

• 20% - Relationships, Feedback & Observation

  • Mentorship conversations

  • Peer discussions and masterminds

  • Watching successful leaders in action

• 10% - Formal Education & Training

  • Books, courses, workshops

  • Certifications and structured learning

Bottom line: This research-backed framework from the Center for Creative Leadership shows hands-on experience is 7x more valuable than traditional education alone.

Learn more about the 70-20-10 rule here

❌ But, the Learning Trap Most Leaders Fall Into

Most entrepreneurs and business leaders approach learning backwards:

• 80% of time consuming content

• 20% of time actually implementing

What thriving executives do differently:

• They don't just read about negotiation → They negotiate deals

• They don't just study leadership theories → They lead teams through crises

• They don't just attend networking events → They build genuine mentorship relationships

💡 My Personal Take

This isn't about dismissing formal education—it's about complementing it strategically.

What I changed:

• Stopped being a passive consumer of business content

• Started seeking challenging projects that stretch my capabilities

• Replaced buying courses with finding mentors for real-time feedback

Key insight: The most successful entrepreneurs and people leader treat every challenge as a learning laboratory. They take on projects slightly beyond their skill level because discomfort = growth.

🎯 Your Action Plan (Try This Week)

For your next learning goal, create a plan following this ratio:

If you have 10 hours to develop a new skill:

• 7 hours - Hands-on practice:

  • Launch that side project

  • Lead that difficult conversation

  • Implement that new strategy

• 2 hours - Feedback & observation:

  • Find a mentor in this area

  • Join a relevant mastermind

  • Shadow someone who's mastered this skill

• 1 hour - Formal study:

  • Read targeted resources

  • Take focused courses

  • Attend specific workshops

Remember: The executives who seem to have an unfair advantage aren't necessarily smarter—they're just learning the way humans are actually wired to learn.

#3. Weekly Reminder

This quote hits me hard every time I consider skipping a workout or postponing important work.

The temporary discomfort of discipline is sharp but brief, while regret lingers for years, sometimes forever.

Think about it: have you ever regretted pushing through discomfort to achieve something meaningful? Probably not. But we've all felt the sting of "what could have been" when we chose comfort over growth.

😂 #4. A relatable workplace moment we've all experienced

@officememes72

Shes gone #workmemes #9to5 #worklifebelike #corporatetok #foryoupage #fyp #workmemesgetmethroughtheday #officehumor #officelife #Meme #MemeCut

I laughed way too hard at this because it perfectly captures how quickly workplace enthusiasm can evaporate! Sometimes acknowledging the universal struggles helps maintain our confidence and perspective.

Summary of Week's Mindset & Performance Boosters:

What confidence challenges are you currently facing? I'd love to hear your thoughts—just hit reply.

This newsletter isn't meant to be a one-way conversation. Have some thoughts to share? Did something in this issue resonate with you or make you question your approach? I'd love to hear about it!

Simply hit reply to this email and share what's on your mind. Your perspective might just inspire a future deep dive.

Until next time, embrace the uncomfortable—that's where growth happens.

Zeel